Sleepover

Will and I are spending the night in the penthouse… at least that’s what they call the room at the end of the hall at Children’s Hospital. He was admitted today as a precaution since he was running a fever while on a strong antibiotic. We’ll be here overnight but hope to go home in the morning following a few rounds of IV antibiotics. Most likely, he has UTI because of the stent put in place during the surgery. A kidney stone also has many bacteria that are released when the stone breaks up after surgery. With all of those foreign objects in his body, it’s reasonable to assume he’d have some trouble.

He is much happier now. It’s really painful for him to urinate but they have given him a large dose of Tylenol with codeine and it’s taking the edge off. I know many parents have had to watch their children in pain constantly, but in the last two weeks, I have seen enough to know I never want to see it again. It is hard to watch my baby hurting when I really cannot help. Nanny has been an amazing help to both of us today: taxi, extra arms, calming words, entertainment. Papa and Papa Jim brought me dinner (which was also breakfast and lunch) and are amusing Will with the Nascar race and giving me time to write this. My little boy is a mama’s boy only when he doesn’t feel good so I’m glad to have the help.

I am sad to miss the fun night we had planned to celebrate Grammy Chris’s birthday who is visiting from Alabama but we are thankful that we’re going to find out what’s causing his fever and be able to put him on the right antibiotics while his stent is in place.

Libby and Andrew were able to spend the day with Grammy and then at Aunt Sara’s. Libs has been looking forward to a tea party with Grammy using the special cups and I think they even went grocery shopping together. They’re planning a visit tonight and we’ll be so happy to see them!

Thanks for your prayers tonight. We were in the ER long enough today to count our blessings because we were one of the few non-trauma cases. We cried for the mommies who came in with their babies on stretchers. After sitting in that microcosm of sadness, I am reminded of a verse I read this week and am comforted that He knows where I am. Psalm 24:1-2 says, “The earth is the Lord’s, and everything in it, the world, and all who live in it, for he founded it on the seas and established it on the waters.” Once again, I am entrusting this little boy to hands much bigger than mine.

A Good Beginning

Will and I were sitting in his hospital room while he recouperated from his adventure in the OR. He happily played with the container that my chicken salad sandwich came in and fussed at me when I forgot to give him a bite of the sandwich. He flirted with his nurse. He enjoyed some chocolate pudding. I'd say he's on the mend! (He especially hammed it up for Nanny.)

The surgery went well. We'll wait a month and go back to the doctor for an x-ray to see if the stone is gone. He'll have a stent in for six weeks and will be on antibiotics during that time. The bonus of that situation is that we may not have any ear infections for six weeks! After the six weeks, he'll have another surgery to remove the stent (barring any problems during that time).

After surgery, Will did okay. His pnuemonia stirred up a little problem but he's fine. He was in more pain than I realized he would be and broke out in a stress rash while he was still in recovery which was unusual. He seems to be comfortable now but he's been pretty miserable off and on. He perked up for his visitors: Papa, Daddy, Libby, Papa Jim and Nanny. He really loved seeing his sister and she said (as she kissed and then patted his head), "I'm so sorry you had surgery, Will-Will." And then she looked at me with a very sincere expression and said, "I wish I was a doctor so I could help Will." Such a sweetheart! I told her she could be a urologist when she grew up if she wanted to but she thought the name was too funny and didn't think it was a good idea anymore.

We had a glimmer of hope that we'd go home tonight but since he's had a rocky start with recovery, we're spending the night. It's a good thing we did because while his nurse was changing his diaper, she found he's already started passing pieces. TMI, you say? Not at all! This means the surgery was probably a success... but we still have to wait.

While we were waiting for surgery, I caught up on an aquantance's blog and I felt renewed after 5 minutes of reading about her circumstances because of her solid faith in Jesus. Her son is also at Children's and they've been here for three or four weeks. They are traveling down an unexpected path with their little boy and yet her blog entry from this morning was an encouragement to those who might be doubting God's hand in this little boy's life. She said, "I wanted to write to any of you who may be questioning or possibly doubting in God. So many people are praying for complete healing and yet we continue to wait. God could have healed him completely three weeks ago. I'm his mom, watching him struggle through this, but I know, without a doubt, that his Heavenly Father watches him even more. The God who created us knows far more than we ever could. His thoughts are higher than ours. He has a reason for this, and whether or not we will ever understand it, we trust it is best. I've already heard so much has been happening as people are praying for him. Some of you are growing closer to Him. Perhaps you are the reason we wait, He wants your heart completely. He loves each one of us too much to let us live without Him."

And so we wait, too.

Gotta Start Somewhere

Although I have at least five unpublished blogs updating my blog friends on our life, I’m skipping ahead to our life at the moment.

But first, Andrew and I love being the parents of two amazing kids. Libby adores preschool and wanted to invite her teacher to her third birthday party. She has a fabulous sense of humor and she would have a play date every day if she could. Her favorite thing to say when we get in the car is, “Where are we going next?” She is a blast and her brother agrees wholeheartedly. Will is a huge fan of finger painting, bath time, swimming lessons, drinking out of a cup and attempting to feed himself. He would also love to have daily play dates especially if another boy will be there. The child is surrounded by women most of the time because of his therapists, nursery workers and gym ladies so he’s thrilled when another male is around. They keep us busy and we’re so thankful for their smiles and laughter. Although we love our kids and since he is in a wedding in Jamaica, Andrew and I are taking a much-needed vacation sans children. It should be a wonderful time together and when we return we’re hoping spring will have sprung!
After enjoying relatively good health over the last 8 months, we hit the end of January and started visiting the doctor about once a week. The kids both had sinus infections and were put on antibiotics. I came down with influenza. Libby caught something from me and wrestled with fevers off and on for over a week. And Andrew joined in the fun with some upper respiratory stuff. Both kids maintained nasty coughs but there isn’t much one can do about that.
At the end of February, when I thought my sleepless nights were coming to a close, Will woke up around 11 pm and was throwing up. It wasn’t that unusual since we’d all been sick and he’d thrown up here and there because of all the mucus draining into his belly. We cleaned him up, gave him a bath, and put him back to bed. Around 4 am, he woke up crying. I went in to get him and he was burning up. I took his temp three times and they were all around 105. After giving him Tylenol, we went to the ER where they swabbed him for the flu, gave him a breathing treatment and did a chest x-ray. We went home with an inhaler, no fever, the encouragement that he’d probably have to come back and no clear diagnosis.
Four days later, his pediatrician called and asked for a follow-up x-ray to confirm pneumonia. Upon reading the x-ray, which did confirmed pneumonia, his pediatrician told us that there was a foreign object in his abdomen which he attributed to him swallowing (or Libby giving him) a small toy. He wanted to have another x-ray in a week to make sure it had passed through the intestines. Of course, I had the exciting job of “watching” for it. While waiting for the third x-ray, Will was on another round of antibiotics to treat the pneumonia. He finished those antibiotics on a Saturday and that Sunday his fever came back at 101.5 and lasted for two or three days. I called the doctor to ask about this but they felt like he’d been on two rounds of antibiotics so this fever was probably viral.
That Thursday, we went to have his third x-ray. (At this point, I was on a first-name basis with the technician. I had also taken Libby to get an x-ray after Will was diagnosed with pneumonia to make sure she didn’t have it.) That x-ray showed that the foreign object was still showing up on the x-ray and that it was probably in his kidney. Of course, the foreign object then became a “mass” which is a much scarier word to me.

We went for an ultrasound of his kidney on Monday of this week. The technician who preformed the ultrasound was very sweet, but as soon as we entered the room with her, I realized she was the same technician who had preformed the ultrasounds in the NICU when we found out Will had PVL (the precursor to CP). Even though I’ve had so much practice controlling anxiety and fear over the last 22 months, I was still overcome with both of those emotions. And, just like with his head ultrasound, when I looked at the screen I could see white stuff in his kidney that shouldn’t be there (I’m considering a career as an ultrasonographer). We were prepared for a kidney stone and when I talked to the doctor in the next couple of days, he agreed. We saw an urologist yesterday (Wednesday) and he immediately suggested surgery but very non-invasive surgery. They will use ultrasonic waves to break up the 1 cm stone and ideally it will become powder and pass easily. We’ll have to wait a month to know whether or not it worked. Unfortunately, the likelihood of another kidney stone is 100%.

Will is going to have surgery on Monday. After being cleared by his cardiologist (he had a benign heart murmur) and his pediatrician (because of having pneumonia so recently), we’re scheduled for 8:45 am and it will be an hour-long process. He’ll be in recovery for an hour and then will stay overnight to monitor his breathing and peeing. Libby will be in the good hands of family (and her preschool teacher) and our friends have offered to help with meals and any other details.

So, although we are so thankful for the chain of events that lead to discovering this stone, we’ve just begun this episode into the wonderful world of kidney stones and although we’ve gotta start somewhere, I didn’t really want to start at all.

If you want to join us, we’re praying for the ultrasonic waves to powderize (sp?) the stone and for the powder and pieces to pass painlessly. We’re praying for the surgeon and nurses to sleep well and to be focused, for the anesthesiologist to have wisdom when administering the anesthesia, for Will to respond well to the anesthesia. We’ll keep praying that there won’t be anymore stones after this. Wouldn’t that be great? And, while being checked out by the pediatrician, we discovered Will has an ear infection. He’s on his third antibiotic in six weeks but I can’t say I am too upset about the extra protection while he’s in the hospital. But I’m still praying for a clean bill of health after this infection is gone.
It is not lost on me that in my Bible study last week I read about the Israelites sitting on a wall listening while doubts were hurled at them about God’s protection and provision from an enemy army. The challenge to the Israelites then and to believers now is to choose faith in the Lord instead of giving into the doubts that inevitably surface when life is harder than expected or situations arise that seem unbelievable. I can’t say I haven’t thought, “Really? One more thing?” but I’ve learned that trusting His plan when I can’t understand His method is a big part of this journey. The verse I chose to memorize last week before all of the surgery drama surfaced has been a comfort to me while driving from doctor to doctor and while finding little shelters for Libby during all of this. The Message translation of Isaiah 43:2-3 says, “When you're in over your head, I'll be there with you. When you're in rough waters, you will not go down. When you're between a rock and a hard place, it won't be a dead end— because I am God, your personal God, The Holy of Israel, your Savior. I paid a huge price for you: all of Egypt, with rich Cush and Seba thrown in! That's how much you mean to me! That's how much I love you! I'd sell off the whole world to get you back, trade the creation just for you.” And He means that for Will, not just for me. If He loves Will that much, how can I doubt His care for him? I can’t. He is lavishing His love on us. (Thanks, Dad)
And so on those mornings when I think I cannot put one foot in front of the other, when I want to drown in the thoughts of “are you kidding me?” and when I’ve had it with all of the running around, I try to remember the truth of that verse. I mean, I have to start somewhere and that’s a pretty safe place to start.

Timing

I am learning, or re-learning, that my circumstances reveal who I am. One quote from the book I am reading in my Bible study says, “God brought a set of circumstances into her life to show her what she was really like— so He could change her.” Clearly, that spoke to me. I’ve learned over these last few months that prior to Will’s birth I didn’t really depend on God, I didn’t really trust Him and I thought I knew better than He did. I am thankful that He is changing me and that the circumstances He has “filtered through His fingers of love” are allowing me to know Him differently than I would have otherwise.

And so, the circumstances are…

Will was officially diagnosed with CP at his neurology appointment at the beginning of March and his doctor ordered an MRI to try to find out why his head was so big and his body was so floppy. The timing couldn’t have been worse, I thought, as I was alone at the doctor with both kids totally not anticipating the diagnosis until he was between 18-24 months old. As I sat there, listening to Dr. Langkamp explain all of the reasons why she was giving him the diagnosis, Libby is yelling, “I want my crackers” and rolling around on the dirty floor. Will is exhausted because we’d been there almost two and half hours and I felt like there was a tidal wave washing over me. Before I started crying (on the way home), I laughed at the ridiculous situation I’d found myself in. And after the tears subsided, I thought about the timing of the office visit. Having both kids with me and both being needy reminded me that our life was not the doctor’s office we were sitting in, that my kids were not diagnoses, that I was a mom before I was anything else and that the distractions of my children can be a welcomed interruption in life’s most difficult moments. But it was still really hard.

His MRI on April 8^th went as planned. He was sedated and did just fine. Andrew and I sat in the waiting room during the scan but were with him while he fell asleep and while he woke up. Dr. Langkamp said the MRI didn’t show anything new. The area around all of his motor tracks suffered damage (arms and legs), which we’ve known about. His head size, which she was concerned about, is normal for him. There were no bleeds or signs of stroke. All of these results were answers to prayer. Now we just keep doing what we’re doing: therapy, therapy, therapy.

We went back to the ophthalmologist on Wednesday to find out the final results of his eye surgery and it’s hard to believe that we had two days of good news in one week. Will's eyes are cured! We go back in six months for a check-up. He has two teeth on the bottom, one on the top, he’s eating three meals a day and he’s laughing at Libby’s every move. He is a joy!

Libby is enjoying his attention and has become quite the song bird. She enjoys singing in a “microwave” on stage or in a grocery cart. They are so fun right now and I love being at home with them. The pigs arrived at the Thomas family farm so we’ve gone to see them no less than fifteen times. She’s gathered eggs with Uncle Phil and Grandpa, petted a chicken and a pig and went into the cows’ pen but did not want to pet them. Kind of surprising considering she talks about cows hourly.

Andrew’s birthday present to me was a trip to Florida. It was an amazing gift and something every mother of young children should be able to do at least once! At the last minute, he couldn’t go but I was able to enjoy five days with amazing family friends who hosted me while our friends, Andrew’s family and mine helped with the kids. Thanks, Presleys!

We celebrated my parents’ 35^th anniversary a couple of weekends ago with a house full of people. I am so thankful for their example of faithfulness to the Lord, to each other, and to us through all that they’ve been through. What a legacy! Libby and Will took their first trip to the zoo the first of April.

Will took the non-traditional view of the zoo by laying in the stroller and taking a nap. He was happy!It was a gorgeous 70-degree day and we met lots of friends there. Although they enjoyed themselves, I was exhausted when we came home. I started to think it was more work than it was worth!!

Easter was exciting this year. It was a great time to remember the importance of Christ’s resurrection and the hope it gives to each of us as we walk through this life. We all went to church and it was great to be sitting in the service together. The choir sang, "Thou, O, Lord, are my shield and the lifter of my head." Those words were meaningful as I was reminded that the Lord can be the lifter of Will's head. I was totally absorbed in the music and moment...that is until Libby said, at a very silent time, "I want to go home!!" Ah, motherhood.

We celebrated Andrew's family's April birthdays and anniversaries last weekend. It was great to be together, eat, open presents, play games and laugh. Libby absolutely loves her aunts, uncles, cousins, grandpa and grandma!

Our playgroup made its first visit to The Hudson Elms Assisted Livning and Nursing Home equipped with our crafts and a parade of strollers. We were able to visit most of the residents, including my step-mother-in-law’s parents: Gran and Pop-pop. Pop-pop received Christ as his Savior during a recent hospital stay; his attitude was amazing— upbeat, loving and gentle. On March 9th, he gave up his earthly body. It is comforting to know he is no longer in pain. We celebrate his life and that we will meet again in heaven. His story is a wonderful reminder to me that God is always at work in people’s lives whether they are five or 88 and His timing is always perfect. I am so thankful to have known this chapter in Pop-pop’s life story. (Thanks, Lyn!)

There isn’t a week that goes by that I am not thankful for our family and the friendships in our life. We seem to be blessed at least monthly with a family dinner or a dinner out with friends or a time to catch up with old friends or play with some cousins.

Thank you for your prayers, emails, texts and phone calls. I was very fearful going into the MRI but am very thankful for the results. Please continue to pray for Will’s core strength, for his head lag, for his thumbs to outdwell, and for his brain. As he continues his therapy, the hope is that his brain will find pathways around the damage and re-learn ways to manage. My prayer continues to be that I will have wisdom as my children’s mother, patience while I wait on the Lord’s timing, and a grateful heart as I reflect on all that I’ve been given. "The desert and the parched land will be glad; the wilderness will rejoice and blossom…and the ransomed of the Lord will enter Zion with singing; everlasting joy will crown their heads. Gladness and joy will overtake them, and sorrow and sighing will flee away.” Isaiah 35:1, 10

Brown-Eyed Boy

Here are some pictures of Will taken on Thursday. He's looking good!

Sweet Success!

Despite my best effort to worry some calamity into being, this day went perfectly! (Yes, I realize I am not supposed to worry but I did!) Everything went as planned and Children’s Hospital is an amazing institution. They were on time, professional yet caring and extremely organized. Will did a great job! My biggest fear was that he would be so hungry that he would cry from the time he woke up until surgery. Thankfully, he woke up at 5:30 am and could still have Pedialite. Once we were at the hospital, he was fussy but fell asleep until we had to weigh him. He was way too nosy to even remember he was hungry and I am so thankful! He didn’t cry when the NP checked him out or when the Child Life Specialist took him to pick out a doctor’s hat for Libby or when the nurse took him to surgery.

I can’t say the same of his mommy! I actually held it together until Dr. Locastro’s nurse came to take Will back for surgery. They were running about 15 minutes early so I was surprised when she said it was time for him to go. Honestly, I’d watched other parents walk by teary-eyed after saying goodbye to their kids and thought, “It’s outpatient surgery. They’re not leaving forever.” And then I bawled as the nurse walked away with Will. I think Andrew was surprised that I was so emotional because I’d been fine up until the very moment she said, “It’s time!”The surgery was very fast and Dr. Locastro talked to us in a conference room afterwards for about ten minutes about Will’s prognosis. Will only sees with one eye at a time which is really a brain issue. But because one cannot rewire the brain, stretching or rearranging the muscles usually sends enough information to the brain to wake up the part that hasn’t been working properly. That being said, we are now waiting to see what happens with Will’s brain. Because of his PVL, it is a little more of a guessing game as far as how much his eyes will be corrected. So, we wait. We’ll see Dr. Locastro in a week, and then six weeks and then every six months until Will is eight and his eyes are “set”. His eyes did look better the very few times he peeped them open today so I am eager to stare at him tomorrow when he feels better.Coming out of the anesthesia was a little rough on him. He was so mad when we walked back to the recovery room—he literally matched his purple scrubs! It took him a while to calm down even after I held him and sang his favorite “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star” a few times. After he calmed down and the morphine kicked in, he fell asleep. He was really hoarse from the tube being down his throat (I didn't even recognize his cry at first) so we ended up staying longer than we thought so he could have a little breathing treatment. The nurses were great and even sent a moose home for Will and one for Libby (a little stuffed moose, that is)!

Will was hooked up to the same machines he wore for 10 weeks in the NICU. I had a few emotions roll over me as I looked at the pulse ox screen and the heart rate monitor. I do not miss those beeps!

He slept from the time we put him in his bed (around 12:30) until about 4:15. Andrew and I also had a long nap; even though we didn’t have surgery, we were pooped! When Will woke up, he drank 12 ounces of Pedialite and kept it down (one concern with eye surgery is that babies have vertigo and are really nauseous) and later had some formula but didn’t keep that all down. He’s back asleep now and seems to be comfortable. He was giving a lot of little moans while he was awake but he also smiled and cooed for his visitors this afternoon. Our friends brought over dinner and Cousin Emmy, Aunt Meri, Papa and Nanny stopped by. Grandma is coming over tomorrow and I know we’ll all appreciate her TLC!

Libby survived Will’s surgery very well. She took care of Papa all day and arrived home toting her suitcase and asking for Will-Will. She was mostly concerned about the boo-boo on Will’s hand from his IV. That concern was quickly resolved when she saw the moose he brought her!

Thank you for your prayers. Tuesday night my friend called right before bed and said, “I hope you’re feeling the prayers for peace that people are praying for you tonight so you can rest.” I had just thought the same thing as I was trying not to worry about every detail of the next day. I did sleep well and so did Will.

Now we’ll pray that the surgery worked and that it will be his last one.

After I posted the last blog entry about living an abundant life, I took Will for his check up just to make sure his ear infection had cleared up-- and it had but his right ear was infected. Since Libby was with me, I asked the doctor to check her ears since she’d had a cough and runny nose for a week. Of course, she had one too! Sometimes I hesitate to even post anything on the blog about what I’ve been learning because I always have to live out that lesson that day or the one after. This time wasn’t any different!!

Next time I post a blog, I am going to talk about learning how to enjoy sunshine, rainbows, and winning a huge cake to eat all by myself. Then maybe I’ll have that sort of day!

A Surgery and Two Birthdays

Since Will was born nine months ago, I think I’ve experienced the abundant life Jesus talks about in John 10. Another translation of that verse says that He came so that we can have a “better life than they ever dreamed of.” At the beginning of the last nine months, I think I would have rather it said “a vastly different life than they ever dreamed of” because there were days in the past when a “better life” didn’t seemed likely. As I’ve walked through this abundant life, I would agree that it’s better than what I’d dreamed of because I never would have called myself to be this dependent on the Lord or this transparent before the people in my life. And the results of both situations have been life-changing. But, a more abundant life doesn’t mean an easier one—I think it means one that overflows!!

And so…

Will had an appointment with an eye doctor at Children’s Hospital in Akron at the end of January. The doctor found that Will has congenital esotropia-- it's what makes Will look cross-eyed most of the time. It's pretty cute! Fortunately the solution is an outpatient surgery that will correct the problem. On February 24^th at 9:00 am, he’ll have surgery that should last 40 minutes. By 11:00 am, we should be on our way home. He won’t have any patches over his eyes but they will look bloodshot for a week and pink for eight weeks. He’ll be under general anesthesia so he won’t know what’s going on… I wonder if they’ll give me something as strong!

A couple of weeks ago on Saturday, Andrew had to work all day so the kids and I invaded Nanny and Papa's house. Papa volunteered to keep Will so that Nanny, Libby and I could go see Libby's first movie. Don't let the picture fool you. She was only in her seat about 40% of the time, but the theater was pretty empty and the people who saw her dancing around thought it was as entertaining as the movie! I think we'll wait another year before we go back!

Libby and I celebrated birthdays. She turned two and I turned 30. My mom and my sister-in-law took me out for a spa day and then surprised me with a birthday lunch complete with so many of my “sisters”. I was stunned and felt so privileged to be surrounded by such sweet friends. Those friends were a big reason we survived Will’s hospital stay. They cleaned my house, brought meals, watched Libby and sat with me during some long hospital nights. Because they shared the heartaches and joy of that experience, the lunch was particularly meaningful. What a great way to mark the beginning of a new decade!

My Lawrence grandparents made the long trip from Missouri to be in Ohio for our birthdays. My sweet grandma is in a wheelchair most of the time so it was no small task for my grandpa (Papa Jim, as Libby called him) to get them both here. We were so thankful for the effort and enjoyed their nine-day visit immensely.

On our birthday, Andrew took the day off and Papa Jim, Libby and he went to see the cows. It was the highlight of Libby’s day! We took her to Chik-Fil-A for lunch because of all of the cows and play area. She loved that too! Later in the day, Grandpa and Grandma stopped by with gifts for the birthday girlsand Libby’s friend Laney brought her cookies and Dora balloons! Nanny came over for dinner bearing gifts, balloons and cake, too! As she opened presents that night, she tried on every piece of clothing she opened. She loved the clothes from Grammy Chris!

Later that week, Will had his follow-up hearing test. He did fine for the first few minutes but when they started checking his left ear, he screamed so much they couldn’t finish the test. The next night, he woke with a fever of 103.7 and the next day, the doctor confirmed he had another ear infection. It’s cleared up now but just to make sure we’re going to the doctor on Friday. He has to be totally clear on infection and antibiotics for his blood work and surgery.

The weekend after her birthday, Libby and some of her friends celebrated her birthday. It was a great night filled with running, jumping, singing and a huge parachute! Libby topped it off by starting the birthday chorus when the lady walking towards her with the cake took too long to start singing!

Since the birthday hubbub has subsided and my grandparents returned home, we’re preparing for Will’s surgery. It will be interesting to see how he changes afterwards. It will alter the way he looks and I am torn by that. His little crossed eyes are endearing and that’s the only way I’ve ever seen him. I know it will make it easier for him to chew on his hands and it will give him depth perception. I can’t imagine not seeing the world normally!

Libby and I have started going to story time at the library on Tuesdays. It’s been nice to have a weekly date with her and she loves the attention! Uncle James comes over to stay with Will and they have some bonding time. UJ is practicing his diapering skills on Will and most of the time the results are positive for all parties involved. When James and Merideth’s daughter arrives in June, he’ll be a pro!

I am really enjoying my Bible study on Wednesday nights. It’s been good to be around adults for one evening a week! This week it was my turn to talk about what God has been doing in my life. As it turned out, the people I am closest to in the study were gone so it was as if I was introducing myself to strangers. Although I talk about our life on the blog and to our friends and family, I haven't really had to start from the beginning with many people. Totally without warning, well, I should have seen it coming, I cried through most of the talk. Fortunately, everyone else cried too so I didn't feel that dumb. It was actually good to say outloud what I've learned over the last nine months and I was thankful that others were encouraged by it as well. But I am not sure I want to do that again any time soon!

As always, thanks for your prayers in the coming weeks. Not only do we have Will’s surgery on the 24^th, the following weeks brings his neurology appointment (March 9^th) and the rescheduled hearing test (March 11^th). He’s pretty flexible but I do get a little overwhelmed with planning around the appointments and finding babysitting for Libby. I am so thankful for our family and friends who offer repeatedly to help and for Grandma who comes every Thursday for a couple of hours. That is such a gift!

The normal requests are that Will’s indwelling thumbs will “out dwell”, that his head lag will resolve and his ATNR will integrate. He still lacks a lot of core strength and it’s a slow process to build that in a baby. The biggest anxiety right now stems from the MRI. Please pray that we will be prepared for whatever the scan shows.

I’ve been reminded again this week of Psalm 18: 30-32.

As for God, his way is perfect;
the word of the LORD is flawless.
He is a shield
for all who take refuge in him.

³¹ For who is God besides the LORD?
And who is the Rock except our God?

³² It is God who arms me with strength
and makes my way perfect.

Now to remember that when my life seems a little too abundant…