Brown-Eyed Boy

Here are some pictures of Will taken on Thursday. He's looking good!

Sweet Success!

Despite my best effort to worry some calamity into being, this day went perfectly! (Yes, I realize I am not supposed to worry but I did!) Everything went as planned and Children’s Hospital is an amazing institution. They were on time, professional yet caring and extremely organized. Will did a great job! My biggest fear was that he would be so hungry that he would cry from the time he woke up until surgery. Thankfully, he woke up at 5:30 am and could still have Pedialite. Once we were at the hospital, he was fussy but fell asleep until we had to weigh him. He was way too nosy to even remember he was hungry and I am so thankful! He didn’t cry when the NP checked him out or when the Child Life Specialist took him to pick out a doctor’s hat for Libby or when the nurse took him to surgery.

I can’t say the same of his mommy! I actually held it together until Dr. Locastro’s nurse came to take Will back for surgery. They were running about 15 minutes early so I was surprised when she said it was time for him to go. Honestly, I’d watched other parents walk by teary-eyed after saying goodbye to their kids and thought, “It’s outpatient surgery. They’re not leaving forever.” And then I bawled as the nurse walked away with Will. I think Andrew was surprised that I was so emotional because I’d been fine up until the very moment she said, “It’s time!”The surgery was very fast and Dr. Locastro talked to us in a conference room afterwards for about ten minutes about Will’s prognosis. Will only sees with one eye at a time which is really a brain issue. But because one cannot rewire the brain, stretching or rearranging the muscles usually sends enough information to the brain to wake up the part that hasn’t been working properly. That being said, we are now waiting to see what happens with Will’s brain. Because of his PVL, it is a little more of a guessing game as far as how much his eyes will be corrected. So, we wait. We’ll see Dr. Locastro in a week, and then six weeks and then every six months until Will is eight and his eyes are “set”. His eyes did look better the very few times he peeped them open today so I am eager to stare at him tomorrow when he feels better.Coming out of the anesthesia was a little rough on him. He was so mad when we walked back to the recovery room—he literally matched his purple scrubs! It took him a while to calm down even after I held him and sang his favorite “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star” a few times. After he calmed down and the morphine kicked in, he fell asleep. He was really hoarse from the tube being down his throat (I didn't even recognize his cry at first) so we ended up staying longer than we thought so he could have a little breathing treatment. The nurses were great and even sent a moose home for Will and one for Libby (a little stuffed moose, that is)!

Will was hooked up to the same machines he wore for 10 weeks in the NICU. I had a few emotions roll over me as I looked at the pulse ox screen and the heart rate monitor. I do not miss those beeps!

He slept from the time we put him in his bed (around 12:30) until about 4:15. Andrew and I also had a long nap; even though we didn’t have surgery, we were pooped! When Will woke up, he drank 12 ounces of Pedialite and kept it down (one concern with eye surgery is that babies have vertigo and are really nauseous) and later had some formula but didn’t keep that all down. He’s back asleep now and seems to be comfortable. He was giving a lot of little moans while he was awake but he also smiled and cooed for his visitors this afternoon. Our friends brought over dinner and Cousin Emmy, Aunt Meri, Papa and Nanny stopped by. Grandma is coming over tomorrow and I know we’ll all appreciate her TLC!

Libby survived Will’s surgery very well. She took care of Papa all day and arrived home toting her suitcase and asking for Will-Will. She was mostly concerned about the boo-boo on Will’s hand from his IV. That concern was quickly resolved when she saw the moose he brought her!

Thank you for your prayers. Tuesday night my friend called right before bed and said, “I hope you’re feeling the prayers for peace that people are praying for you tonight so you can rest.” I had just thought the same thing as I was trying not to worry about every detail of the next day. I did sleep well and so did Will.

Now we’ll pray that the surgery worked and that it will be his last one.

After I posted the last blog entry about living an abundant life, I took Will for his check up just to make sure his ear infection had cleared up-- and it had but his right ear was infected. Since Libby was with me, I asked the doctor to check her ears since she’d had a cough and runny nose for a week. Of course, she had one too! Sometimes I hesitate to even post anything on the blog about what I’ve been learning because I always have to live out that lesson that day or the one after. This time wasn’t any different!!

Next time I post a blog, I am going to talk about learning how to enjoy sunshine, rainbows, and winning a huge cake to eat all by myself. Then maybe I’ll have that sort of day!

A Surgery and Two Birthdays

Since Will was born nine months ago, I think I’ve experienced the abundant life Jesus talks about in John 10. Another translation of that verse says that He came so that we can have a “better life than they ever dreamed of.” At the beginning of the last nine months, I think I would have rather it said “a vastly different life than they ever dreamed of” because there were days in the past when a “better life” didn’t seemed likely. As I’ve walked through this abundant life, I would agree that it’s better than what I’d dreamed of because I never would have called myself to be this dependent on the Lord or this transparent before the people in my life. And the results of both situations have been life-changing. But, a more abundant life doesn’t mean an easier one—I think it means one that overflows!!

And so…

Will had an appointment with an eye doctor at Children’s Hospital in Akron at the end of January. The doctor found that Will has congenital esotropia-- it's what makes Will look cross-eyed most of the time. It's pretty cute! Fortunately the solution is an outpatient surgery that will correct the problem. On February 24^th at 9:00 am, he’ll have surgery that should last 40 minutes. By 11:00 am, we should be on our way home. He won’t have any patches over his eyes but they will look bloodshot for a week and pink for eight weeks. He’ll be under general anesthesia so he won’t know what’s going on… I wonder if they’ll give me something as strong!

A couple of weeks ago on Saturday, Andrew had to work all day so the kids and I invaded Nanny and Papa's house. Papa volunteered to keep Will so that Nanny, Libby and I could go see Libby's first movie. Don't let the picture fool you. She was only in her seat about 40% of the time, but the theater was pretty empty and the people who saw her dancing around thought it was as entertaining as the movie! I think we'll wait another year before we go back!

Libby and I celebrated birthdays. She turned two and I turned 30. My mom and my sister-in-law took me out for a spa day and then surprised me with a birthday lunch complete with so many of my “sisters”. I was stunned and felt so privileged to be surrounded by such sweet friends. Those friends were a big reason we survived Will’s hospital stay. They cleaned my house, brought meals, watched Libby and sat with me during some long hospital nights. Because they shared the heartaches and joy of that experience, the lunch was particularly meaningful. What a great way to mark the beginning of a new decade!

My Lawrence grandparents made the long trip from Missouri to be in Ohio for our birthdays. My sweet grandma is in a wheelchair most of the time so it was no small task for my grandpa (Papa Jim, as Libby called him) to get them both here. We were so thankful for the effort and enjoyed their nine-day visit immensely.

On our birthday, Andrew took the day off and Papa Jim, Libby and he went to see the cows. It was the highlight of Libby’s day! We took her to Chik-Fil-A for lunch because of all of the cows and play area. She loved that too! Later in the day, Grandpa and Grandma stopped by with gifts for the birthday girlsand Libby’s friend Laney brought her cookies and Dora balloons! Nanny came over for dinner bearing gifts, balloons and cake, too! As she opened presents that night, she tried on every piece of clothing she opened. She loved the clothes from Grammy Chris!

Later that week, Will had his follow-up hearing test. He did fine for the first few minutes but when they started checking his left ear, he screamed so much they couldn’t finish the test. The next night, he woke with a fever of 103.7 and the next day, the doctor confirmed he had another ear infection. It’s cleared up now but just to make sure we’re going to the doctor on Friday. He has to be totally clear on infection and antibiotics for his blood work and surgery.

The weekend after her birthday, Libby and some of her friends celebrated her birthday. It was a great night filled with running, jumping, singing and a huge parachute! Libby topped it off by starting the birthday chorus when the lady walking towards her with the cake took too long to start singing!

Since the birthday hubbub has subsided and my grandparents returned home, we’re preparing for Will’s surgery. It will be interesting to see how he changes afterwards. It will alter the way he looks and I am torn by that. His little crossed eyes are endearing and that’s the only way I’ve ever seen him. I know it will make it easier for him to chew on his hands and it will give him depth perception. I can’t imagine not seeing the world normally!

Libby and I have started going to story time at the library on Tuesdays. It’s been nice to have a weekly date with her and she loves the attention! Uncle James comes over to stay with Will and they have some bonding time. UJ is practicing his diapering skills on Will and most of the time the results are positive for all parties involved. When James and Merideth’s daughter arrives in June, he’ll be a pro!

I am really enjoying my Bible study on Wednesday nights. It’s been good to be around adults for one evening a week! This week it was my turn to talk about what God has been doing in my life. As it turned out, the people I am closest to in the study were gone so it was as if I was introducing myself to strangers. Although I talk about our life on the blog and to our friends and family, I haven't really had to start from the beginning with many people. Totally without warning, well, I should have seen it coming, I cried through most of the talk. Fortunately, everyone else cried too so I didn't feel that dumb. It was actually good to say outloud what I've learned over the last nine months and I was thankful that others were encouraged by it as well. But I am not sure I want to do that again any time soon!

As always, thanks for your prayers in the coming weeks. Not only do we have Will’s surgery on the 24^th, the following weeks brings his neurology appointment (March 9^th) and the rescheduled hearing test (March 11^th). He’s pretty flexible but I do get a little overwhelmed with planning around the appointments and finding babysitting for Libby. I am so thankful for our family and friends who offer repeatedly to help and for Grandma who comes every Thursday for a couple of hours. That is such a gift!

The normal requests are that Will’s indwelling thumbs will “out dwell”, that his head lag will resolve and his ATNR will integrate. He still lacks a lot of core strength and it’s a slow process to build that in a baby. The biggest anxiety right now stems from the MRI. Please pray that we will be prepared for whatever the scan shows.

I’ve been reminded again this week of Psalm 18: 30-32.

As for God, his way is perfect;
the word of the LORD is flawless.
He is a shield
for all who take refuge in him.

³¹ For who is God besides the LORD?
And who is the Rock except our God?

³² It is God who arms me with strength
and makes my way perfect.

Now to remember that when my life seems a little too abundant…